so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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