have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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