Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(401): View more from Rhode Island

i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(401): i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care. http://tfl.nu/npdd

Replies (10) Good night (2992) Bad night (665)
Favorite
(734): View more from Michigan

we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(734): we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS". http://tfl.nu/4yux

Replies (23) Good night (677) Bad night (5772)
Favorite
(612): View more from Minnesota

I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(612): I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement. http://tfl.nu/3cr8

Replies (27) Good night (5778) Bad night (815)
Favorite
(425): View more from Washington

My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(425): My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed http://tfl.nu/4mh9

Replies (13) Good night (5102) Bad night (1217)
Favorite
(830): View more from Texas

just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(830): just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao http://tfl.nu/019w

Replies (17) Good night (4019) Bad night (1117)
Favorite
(740): View more from Ohio

well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(740): well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong. http://tfl.nu/972k

Replies (12) Good night (4551) Bad night (876)
Favorite
(414): View more from Wisconsin

saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(414): saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings http://tfl.nu/clzp

Replies (13) Good night (2957) Bad night (4833)
Favorite
(630): View more from Illinois

She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(630): She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving. http://tfl.nu/1pg2

Replies (16) Good night (5663) Bad night (886)
Favorite
(417): View more from Missouri

As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(417): As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits. http://tfl.nu/fap8

Replies (17) Good night (906) Bad night (2974)
Favorite
(802): View more from Vermont

Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(802): Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable http://tfl.nu/50aw

Replies (7) Good night (1106) Bad night (2489)
Favorite
(250): View more from British Columbia

some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(250): some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF http://tfl.nu/zk16

Replies (6) Good night (2034) Bad night (516)
Favorite
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(832): Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL. http://tfl.nu/25yr

Replies (3) Good night (1704) Bad night (466)
Favorite
(714): View more from California

No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(714): No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you. http://tfl.nu/hejd

Replies (4) Good night (385) Bad night (681)
Favorite
(608): View more from Wisconsin

Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(608): Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird http://tfl.nu/qw9p

Replies (5) Good night (801) Bad night (283)
Favorite
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(412): I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630? http://tfl.nu/wg1y

Replies (0) Good night (456) Bad night (359)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: