Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize