If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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