she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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