Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
