"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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