so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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