So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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