Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
he fucked my hip out of place.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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