yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
