Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Randomize
