I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?