Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
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