Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
