sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Come see our sink grown plant.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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