is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
