No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
