And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
