That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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