im gay
i know
yea but for you.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
