how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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