just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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