Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
