...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
