Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
