On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
