You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
