This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
