I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
