you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
