I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
cat food counts as protein by the way
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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