Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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