The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
