she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
