Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
