Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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