Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
wow bdsm is so cute
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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