i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
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