What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize