So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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