this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
