Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize
