when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
