Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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