Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
