Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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