my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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