Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize